What's on your mind?

So I've been asked multiple times what runs through my head when I say something. I'll admit, sometimes I take offense to that questions because come on, I'm not that mental. The things that come out of my mouth have been filtered and everything (insert applicable 'that's what she said' joke). I'm not totally stupid.

So, that being said, this is going to be an entry about the crap that runs through my brain that I don't say. Everyone should consider themselves lucky that I sort of filter.

Morning

What? What day is it?

Caffeine. I need caffeine. CAFFFFFFFIENE!!!

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee putting on my faaaaace. Make up sucks. That's an investment I wish I didn't have. Why don't guys wear makeup? Who made up this shitty social norm? I bet it was the Romans or something. CURSE YOU WOMEN OF THE PAST.

I could really use some waffles or something. Pancakes? I really should wake up earlier to make breakfast. Poptarts aren't that great. Oh but these are pumpkin pie flavored. Okay I can handle that. WHERE'S MY COFFEE. BREW FASTER, GERRY, BRRRRRREW.

Oh I suppose I should put on clothes other than my pajamas. What's the weather today? It looks sunny out. Jeans and a t-shirt. Alllllriiiight.

HOLY SHIT BALLS IT'S FREEZING OUT HERE. YOU MOTHEREFFING SUN. YOU TELL ALL OF THE LIES. MY FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE IS COOOOOOOOOOOLD. WHERE'S MY BUS?!?!???!?!

Aw man I forgot to pee before I left. What the hell. Oh God. Now I really gotta goooooooooo. Move traffic, mooooove.

Is it trashy to want a drink at 9 am? Probably. I don't even care.

At School

Why is that kid wearing shorts and a t-shirt? Is he crazy? He must be on the crazy juice.

Why is food in Gopher Express so expensive? ALL I WANT IS A BAGEL. STOP RAPING MY BANK ACCOUNT.

Hey I see a magazine with Hobbit on the cover. HOW YOU DOIN BILBO BAGGINS? HOW. YOU. DOIN.

How the hell did hobbits haul all that stuff? I can barely make it up the stairs. So tired. Sleeeeeep.

I want a smoothie.

What are we even talking about? Oh that was the reading we were supposed to do? I'll get right on that...

I wonder if I can connect to the WiFi. My social networks need me to be clever and witty har har har

Laptop, you have been on for 10 minutes, how are you at 30% battery? I LOATHE YOU.

Falling asleep. Sleeeeeeeep. I wonder if the teacher will notice if I fall asleep. No that's bad. I'm paying for this class, I should focus.

Head nod. Head nod. Nodding head. Man, I'm annoying myself with my head bobbing. No wonder my neck is always sore.

I still haven't peed! GOTTA GO GOTTA GO GOTTA GOOOOOO

Oooh my phone is blinking. I don't know why I bother trying to discreetly check it. No one just awkwardly stares at their own crotch, right? I love text messages.

I should make a list of things to do. That will make me feel productive. Ummmmmmm.

Oh oh oh! I can blend different colored gummy bear parts to make a Frankenbear and he will be ten different kinds of delicious!

Why is this classroom so cold? U of M, what are you using my tuition for if not to turn on the heaters? I shouldn't be wearing my jacket in the classroom.

I'm hungry.

Bored. Bored bored.

Ha. Diet Coke clown. Hahahahahahaha

I want my puppy. Doooooooooooooooggie. I want all of the puppies.

Gotta peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

 

So not wild water?

 HEY I HEARD YOU WERE A WILD ONE

Oh hair. I wish I could just buzz you off. WHY SO DIFFICULT?

I hate this TA. He's a dick. Giving me bad grades for no reason. You sir, are a jerkwad and a half. STOP BEING SO HATEFUL.

Wheeeeeere are you, Chriiiiistmas? I LOVE CHRISTMAS MUSIC.

Except for Santa Baby. That song just makes me really uncomfortable, especially when played in my headphones.

Don't make eye contact with anyone whilst walking. They may talk to you. Must catch bus, must catch bus.

I HATE PEOPLE IN VESTS. LEAVE ME ALONE. I HAVE NO MONEY FOR YOU. STOP ASKING MY NAME. DO YOU NOT SEE THE HEADPHONES. NO TALKING.

Safety of the bus. Sweet salvation. What a sorry sorry salvation. What is my life?Why is everyone so strange?

Home

AMERICAN HORROR STORY ON TONIGHT WOOOOOOOOO!!! YEA YEA YEA!!!

Oh food. I love food. Kraaaaaft Mac n Cheeeeeeeeeese. Cheeeeeeeeeese cheeeeeeeese. Oh hey, Blue Moon.

Nap time? Nap time.

I've got candaaaaaay. Nom nom nom nom nom. ALL OF THE SUGAR. WEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

What the hell? Why is Kevin Bacon on TV?

I wonder what the inside of a pokeball looks like. I wonder if it was like a mansion since they just turned into a beam of light.

Hey MioEnergy, just because you have green and red flavors does not make you Christmasy. STOP LYING.

Oh I have homework. BUT I WANT TO WATCH ALL OF THE YOUTUBE VIDEOS.

Holy American Horror Story. This nun is EFFED UP. WOAH.

Sleeeeeepy. So sleepy. I love sleep.






See? Everyone is very lucky that I don't spout out all that is on my mind since it's kind of a weird place.


Currently Listening to: Christmas music on Pandora