B Allyoucan B

Let me tell you all a story.

It’s a long one, so settle under some blankets.

Such a handsome boy

There once was a little horse. I’ve been thinking about this horse a lot lately. I had a dream about him the other day that really had a strange effect on me. I dreamt that I was at a horse show but none of the regular horses were there but all the people were. I went into the dressing room to get my hair and makeup done like usual before a class and the room had all of the usual things in it. I looked up to call for help with my hair and I saw a horse looking over the stall wall.

It was Soldier.

The weird thing was that, even in the dream, I realized that he was gone and has been for a while now. He just kept staring at me over the wall and I kept staring at him. I eventually walked out of the dressing room at looked at him through his stall door. He just kept looking at me, bobbing his head around, then going back to staring at me. I never tried to pet him or anything because, again, I realized that he should not be there. I wanted to pet him and talk to him but I could not.

I woke up crying. Not the gentle rolling of tears either, it was the puffy eyes and runny nose and inability to breathe.

I have never had a dream like that and I’m not sure I liked it. I love the idea of him watching over me and seeing what I’m doing but the fact that I couldn’t speak or touch him was really hard, just like it is in real life.

I don’t know if I have ever written down how he came into my life so I guess after contemplating our time together for the past three days, today would be a good day to do so.

He came to Centre Pointe sometime during the beginning of winter in 2010. We took him in and Jennifer called me and told me that we had a new horse come in and that he was very cute, an Arabian. I was curious but not too enthused because I was hoping that we’d get a super cool new school horse that I could potentially take to a few shows.

Do not judge me. I know it was shallow but show season had finished for me and I was already looking forward to the next show.

 The first time I saw Soldier, I was somewhat shocked. He was so skinny- to the point that I’d call him a bit scrawny. His little ribs were showing, his coat was dull yet he was tremendously shaggy, and he seemed so scared of anyone touching him. Normally when I visit with a new horse, I’ll talk to them and they’ll come and see what I’m about. Solider went to the back of his stall and just stared at me. He was also called Army at the time with the registered name of B Allyoucan B (which, to this day, sounds like a Ke$ha song to me).

 At this point, I was curious about him. He had the most adorable face and I could see why we had taken him in. I asked around and no one really knew his story. Later on, we would figure out that he was MN bred, had gone to Nationals and won, had excellent training, and then seemed to fall off the map.

Look at that adorable little bug face!

 One day I went out to have a lesson and Angela informed me that I would be riding Solider. I was tentative at the time because he was so small and I didn’t really see the point in riding him since I had also been informed that he was a hunter. At the time, I was just starting to ride Buzz so that was intriguing to me and made me somewhat happy to have another horse to practice on but I wanted to be riding a saddleseat horse too.

That horse challenged me more than any other horse had during that first ride.

I could not figure out his steering, his speeds, his headset, or even how to sit in the saddle. Even though all of my fumbling, Solider was as patient as he could be expected to be but I was still baffled as to why I could not figure him out.

So I signed up for another lesson on him.

 This time, I brushed him and tacked him up before the lesson. We had a good talk and I figured out some of his “quirks”. He did not like any fast movement, didn’t like his ears touched, and didn’t like anything aggressive. Even pushing at him to move him over made him jumpy.

After about one month of trying to pack on the weight.

 This next lesson went far smoother once I had figured out that he was not a push horse, but more of an ask horse. Through all my rides on him, he always gave more than you asked only if you asked politely. He never wanted to give you a reason to be mad or aggressive with him.

Of course, it was during these continuing lessons on him that the bug was planted about conditioning him into show form for the next season.  We had been beefing him up by giving him all the food he wanted so he needed to develop the muscle tone again.

Spring and starting to bulk up on muscle!

I didn’t have the money to be taking a large amount of lessons but I wanted to be around him. Something about him was special. As we know today, Soldier had been through a lot in his life up until he came to Centre Pointe yet he still had a spark about him and the willingness to please. I was given the privilege of riding him and working with him to get him in show shape.

In the months leading up to Sahara Sands, I learned so much. Between Buzz and Soldier, I was riding a lot and able to take my time and try different things to see what the results would be. The two of them had personality extremes too so the same things did not work for both horses.

Sometimes I would just take Soldier out of his stall, work on one thing for 30 minutes, and then lead him around the arena and let him eat a bucket of oats.

  I think it was in that time that I started to think of him as mine in a way- that little horse held my heart. Between figuring out that Smarties were his favorite candy and coaxing him to accept me touching his ears, a bond had formed.

 

  That little Arabian wormed his way into my Saddlebred loving heart enough to want to take him to a show where I’d be in a new division, at a new show, on a new breed.

He looked so handsome all groomed up and bathed at the show in May. With his mane all braided, his neck that had developed some extreme muscle could be seen and I could not have been more proud of all the work we had accomplished together.

I went into that show knowing that the numbers were huge for classes and that I was on a school horse against champions with multiple titles. Unknown to me at the time, Soldier had acquired his Legion of Honor but had never had his points paid for so they were just sitting there inactive until someone forked over $700. My goal for that show was to go into the ring and have a clean class and to prove that we had what it took to not look like total idiots.

Of course, Soldier had to surpass the goal when we came in 5^th out of 15 in our first class.

There have been a few moments at horseshows that I will never forget. Hearing his named called out for a ribbon is one of them. My little engine that could had proved to us all, yet again, to never doubt him.

There was something so relaxing about riding him in the ring. He knew his job and would never do anything stupid yet you still had to work at it.

My failing attempt at studying

We made it to two shows after that first one- the State Fair and Sahara Sands again in 2012. Each time I had memorable rides, some better than others but none that I ever regret because no time or money was ever wasted on him. One of my favorite pass times with him was at shows when we were not getting ready for a class or to work. I would pull a chair up to the front of his stall and open his door and curl up and read or eat lunch. He would come over and rest his head on the top of my head or set his nose on my shoulder to see what I was doing and then go do his own thing.

Solider liked to share my food.

 It was that quiet serenity of being in the same space as him that made me the happiest. It made me feel like we had an understanding of each other and a bond that would never be gone.

The downside of showing and riding the one Arabian hunt horse in a barn full of saddleseat Saddlebreds is that, as a school horse of many horses, Soldier had to be sent away every now and then. The first time was before the State Fair which was fine because Winstead took him into his home farm. I was told that I could visit whenever and work him and then, before the State Fair, he’d come back to Centre Pointe so he could get hauled with the others.

Soldier developed a major crush on Winstead’s mother’s Arabian mare, Gracie. I loved Solider dearly but let me tell you, he was a nasty little beast to deal with when he wants something. Working him was a pain because he was always looking for Gracie. He was also temperamental when another horse would try to come near her.

He may have been perfect in my eyes, but he definitely had some flaws.

 

Running away from anyone who tried to catch him from his pasture was one of his favorite games and my least favorite. It would take a bucket of oats to get him anywhere near me when I had a lead rope. The nasty habit of flinging his head when being bridled stopped being a problem for me but, alas, not for anyone else (y’all, I had to bribe that horse with treats for MONTHS). He had a habit of taking off trotting when I would get on because he was so anxious all the time.

That little horse, I swear.

Then the time came, after my final show with him at Sahara Sands, when he was sent to live permanently with the lovely ladies over at Golden Ridge. I knew he would be so happy there and get to go to many shows with oodles of riders to love on him. I was excited for him, but still, heartbroken that he would be gone.

I was taken to visit him towards the end of January. I was so happy to see his face that I started crying and hugging his neck. I brought him out of the stall and just stood with him. The calm that filled me whenever he was near me was still there. I think we stood there for a half hour just watching lessons; he never moved or tried to get away. I smothered him with all the love and treats I could without looking like a total freak (which, I mean, have you guys met me?)

"Do I get my Smarties and granola bar now?"

I left promising I’d visit him again soon.

I got a call from Todd on Valentine’s day while I was on a bus out to visit Erin. I called him back as soon as I was off the bus in a total panic.

Soldier had died.

My little man’s great heart finally gave out.

It’s thought that he was out in a pasture playing in the snow and he had a heart attack. There was no sign of thrashing around or anything. It looked like he had just laid down and passed away.

I think about the fact that I never had the opportunity to say good-bye to him every single day.

I look at pictures of him and remember how he loved kisses on his nose, how he was always looking for a treat, and the way he liked to rest his head on my head and breathe.

 

There are so many people who made our time together so special for so many reasons and you know who you are because you miss him too.

There will never be another horse like him- that much I know.

I miss my little Soldier and his heart of gold but I believe he is in a good place and I’ll see him again eventually.